Dreary Weather Makes for a No-Day

A "No-Day". That's the best pharse/word I could come up with to describe that kind of day that feels like it didn't happen at all. Like maybe the city you live in has fallen into some crevice of space and time where the latter only floats over the surface above you, never touching you. My lack of circadium rhythums and belief that time is not linear help me cope better with the aforementioned kind of day. Still, gloomy weather doesn't help.

And gloomy weather is exactly what we got. It was horrible timing. Saturday night was the last night of the big play at Southeast High School, Little Women. My sister played the lead of Jo and her boyfriend Jay (who is a so common in our household now that I leave out Reese's Pieces for him and try to avoid his surprise attacks even when my brain tells me he's at school) played Laurie. My sister sang and acted so beautifully that even I cried. And of course, the scene where Beth dies is hard. Way too close to home. I feel sorry for my sister who had to reherse that particular scene over and over whilst I was in the hospital. Apparently it was very hard for her. She never shows this kind of emotion in front of me, of course. Except for last month when I wasn't doing very well and our neighbor had to come over to watch me. Ginny unexpectedly came up and kissed me on the head!! She's never done anything like that before in her life.

Anyway, the play was wonderful. I got to see it 2.5 times (the .5 is from where I pooped out after the first act.) I wish I could have seen every show but I've been so terribly sick lately. Low-grade fevers, chills, weakness, dizziness, aching, nausea, etc. Tomorrow I'll call the doctor. I had called Friday but I couldn't actually go to see the doctor because I was too sick and wasn't able to breathe properly. The told me to go to the emergency room, but I really wasn't in the mood. It was too nice a day to sit inside a dim, depressing ER room anyway. I eventually recupperated a little and got past the emergency stage.

So this morning I wake up and Ginny is in the kitchen making her wonderful french toast. Why this girl who had gotten home at midnight after a slew of photo calls and performances was now up at 9:30 in the morning making french toast was a mystery to me.
"Oh. My. You're up," I said.
"Yeah, um, oops; Mother's Day," she replied gesturing towards the semi-burt pieces of egg-coated bread.
"Well, you gave mom all those wonderful performances. That's gift enough," I said.

Apparently Ginny didn't think so because she had already been out to the Dollar Store and bought Mother's Day balloons. I helped set the table and position the balloons and then got out my own gifts: a wooden rose with a beautiful scent (handmade by a craftsman at Ren Faire), a lotion I had made with oils she had picked for fragrance and a foot spray I had made her using essential oils that would scent and kill off bacteria. I had also folded her laundy the day before. She said that was her favorite gift.

Although we had a nice breakfast and all that, we (especially Ginny) were all having that post-performace let down thing. So we went to Gordman's and Ginny and each bought a bra. But not fun bras. Plain black ones.

Then we went to Gateway Mall and looked at a store or two (I spent most of my time hovering around the bead kiosk where the lady tried to hire me for the shop since I already did beadwork. I bought amazonite earrings instead). Then we ate lunch in the food court and got cookies for tea time with Gramma, whom I gave my other wood rose. At tea I tried to sit up and be present. I had brought origami paper and baby rats yet I still wound up curled up on the couch and soon realized I felt exactly like I had when my hemoglobin was so low I needed a blood transfusion.

So I went home, read a little and somehow fell asleep in my recliner. When I woke up we were figuring out dinner. Ginny and Jay decided to go to Culvers and get us food while mom and I finally went and got my rice crackers and some fun drinks. When I put the first cracker in my mouth I knew things would be okay in the coming week. Those little seaweed-encrusted things have prophetic power.

At home the four of us engaged in some hilarious conversation about dreams which brighted my mood a little.

Jay bought my mom some of her favorite candy bars. Earlier my mom had let Jay have one of her balloons so he would have something to give him mom. Silly boy.

So now I have some lovely drugs in my body and I've lit candles and my room is peaceful. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day. It shall start with a bloodtest.