Showing posts with label health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label health. Show all posts

Dessert

>> Saturday, July 23, 2011

It’s back to checking glucose levels, giving myself insulin shots and worrying over food choices. The Solumedrol (super Prednisone) infusion yesterday really hit me hard. I’ve been feeling icky ever since. Lots of pain, nausea, tiredness but also restlessness from the higher blood pressure and glucose levels.
I got a little bit of exercise today. Mum and I spent an hour or so at Hobby Lobby looking for some art project materials to distract us. I got some watercolor and drawing supplies. I hope Mom makes use of them, too.
That’s about as much as I did for exercise besides a bit of yoga in the morning. My legs have been giving me some bad pain all last night and today and I’ve got a headache. Otherwise I would have spent some time in the exercise room here at the transplant house.
Reading about how Treya handles her diabetes in “Grace and Grit” I am feeling more inspired about managing all this until things go back to normal (blood sugar goes down).
It’s hard because all I want to eat are desserts, onigiri and Spirutein shakes. The shakes are okay, the onigiri in moderation, but, oh, the desserts! I’ve never really liked desserts but steroids have changed all that. It’s been very hard to ignore all my cravings but I want to do everything I can to make myself as healthy as possible.

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Summer Shorts

>> Thursday, July 21, 2011

I’m so glad I’m reading “Grace and Grit” by Ken Wilber and that it came into my life when it did. Treya’s journey in many places mirrors mine or teaches me a lesson that I was trying to figure out.
Today I put on one of the new pairs of shorts I bought. They are around three sizes bigger than what I was wearing last summer and yet they were still too small. My stomach has been more distended the past couple of weeks and then there’s the general swelling and, of course, the Prednisone. I’ve gotten fatter all over, though not heavier on the scale. For the first time in years I have arm flab. Part of me is glad about this after all the time spent worrying about being too skinny and now eating enough. The other part of me gets scared of staying this size or getting fatter. Yes, I’m at a healthy weight and my stomach will be swollen for awhile yet and I’m on Prednisone. I don’t like how I look at this size and as for how others think of my looks…well, I just want people to see me at what I judge to be my best. Or at least acceptable. Really, I just want to be comfortable in my own skin. I also want to present myself as someone who practices what they preach (i.e. a healthy lifestyle for mind, body and spirit). I want to overcome this fear and leas a healthy lifestyle out of honesty, not fear.

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Mothering The Body

>> Saturday, April 23, 2011

“In a way, mothering is the task before us all-to nurture ourselves while vigilantly nudging ourselves forward. This requires a balance between self-discipline and compassion.”-Natalya Podgorny, Editor’s Note, Yoga International Magazine, Spring 2011.

I know this concept well. Not because anyone taught it to me but because it is a lesson taught by human experience. Those who learn and apply this concept experience a balance in their life between rest and ambition (or whatever term you choose to express the healthy stress in your life). As someone with chronic pain and an incurable disease this concept applies to my life most often in a physical, illustrative sense.

I must nurture, care and listen to my body, treating it with love and respect. Sometimes this means forcing myself to rest for an hour in the middle of doing housework and sometimes it means taking it easy for a whole day. The self-discipline side of things come both when I “force” myself to take a break and nurture my body and also when I tell myself I’ve been lying down long enough and I should go outside and take a walk (I know I’ll feel better for it).

This balance comes from a healthy relationship with our bodies and our minds. The mind-body link must be established through listening to our body’s signals and learning from past experiences. The practice of meditation comes in handy here when we need to slow down and let our body tell us what the next step should be. For instance, I might tune into my body which is saying, ‘remember how good a nice stretch feels in the morning?’ and my mother-self says, ‘yes, let’s greet the day with spirit and movement’ but my child-self says, ‘nah, let’s just sit in bed until we feel more inspired’. Here is the mother nudging her chick to the edge of the branch to fly. The chick’s spirit wants to fly, her body wants to fly, yet her mother still has to give her a nudge in the right direction.

Sometimes I fall off the bandwagon for a day and I realize at the end of it that I really wasn’t listening to my body and spirit. Maybe I ran off with all sorts of things to get done when I should have taken more breaks or maybe I stayed in bed all day when I should have gotten in some more activity. In pain rehab at Mayo Clinic we called this ‘moderation and modification’. Everything in moderation-activity in moderation and rest in moderation. Modification means fitting your moderation to meet your body’s individual needs, which brings me back to the practice of tuning in and listening to the body. Everyone’s body is different and they each have their own individual needs. Only you know what is truly healthy for you and you can only find that out by experience and listening to your body.

Nurture and love your body by mothering it as you would a young child- with compassionate discipline. As I continue to practice this I know that, even though my body has its share of troubles, I am giving it the best chance I can to overcome them.

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Thanksgiving

>> Thursday, November 26, 2009

This is another post from the PSC Partners Seeking a Cure discussion board. The "friend" in this post is Rayne, of course!

I got an email today from a good friend who has inflammitory Crohn's. We have a lot in common besides our health issues so friendship was natural. Her email was just to say hi and that her husband forgot to get potatoes. My response is as follows:

No! Not the potatoes! Us sick people need bland starches, darnit! lolI made asian food and nibbled on a little of "real" thanksgiving stuff. I did eat pie. Last year I was too sick to eat much and there was no pumpkin pie left by the time I felt a bit better. I threw a pity fit about how it was already bad enough that I had missed out on Thanksgiving stuff and felt too miserable to socialize much and now my last shred of tradition had been ripped out from under me. This year I made sure to at least eat a piece, even if my stomach wasn't thrilled about it.

My friend responded saying she spent days taking Phernergan beforehand and had done alright in the eating department. However, she admitted to me, she was secretly not a Thanksgiving fan because of the emphasis on eating, which is always a struggle for her (and us PSCers). My second reply is as follows:

I'm with you on the "secretly hating Thanksgiving" part. Back before I was veggie I used to spit out my turkey into a napkin when my parents weren't looking. I was used to lunch meat (which I don't think really counts as "meat") but the real thing wasn't something I found very appetizing. My mom is the same way. This year I was able to eat okay, but I ended up getting weepy anyway because I was so drugged that I couldn't be "present" and have a good time. Right now I'm really going downhill and, after a week of being a normal 22-year-old and not going to the ER, it seems so cruel to be thrown back into this sick life. Especially around holidays where you have some sort of Hallmark expectation of yourself.

I thought that probably a lot of you were having some thoughts along the same lines. Maybe holidays can be hard for you because of your illness. If you need to rant about it, rant about it. If you have some tips, please share. Maybe by getting together and realizing that we all struggle on somewhat of the same level with some of the same things around the holidays will help us all feel less alone.

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The Month of Health

From teh PSC Partners Seeking a Cure discussion board:

So, by some miracle, I woke up one morning about a month ago and felt great. Yeah, I had my moments and still needed some pain med. But let me tell you, I was out shopping and driving. I bought high heels and lacy underwear and told myself I didn't have to face a life of Ugg boots and hospital-appropriate panties.

I wore makeup and did my hair. I hung out with friends. I cooked food. I ATE the food. I danced and laughed. My MELD went down to an 11....which wasn't so great, but my health was showing on paper, anyway.

I wanted to share this because, although this board is a good place to come when you need help, it's also a place to come and tell people, "Hey, things will be okay and I'm living proof of that!"

For the past 4-7 days (can't keep track) I've been really starting to go downhill. Back to where I started. It's hard and sometimes that brief breath of healthy air seems like a curse. Like life was taunting me or something. But deep down I know that's not true. I came back with new lessons, a new perspective and some cute new outfits. Before this happened I was pretty sure I wasn't going to live that much longer. I'd even written down some funeral plans and asked my dad to come to Lincoln so I could see him one more time. So believe me when I say, if a one-month-of-miracle-health can happen to me, it can happen to you.

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Green Goddess

>> Monday, August 24, 2009

If you haven't seen the movie Crazy Sexy Cancer by Kris Carr, you need to see it. Now. Go! Okay, finish reading this blog first. Then go watch the movie.

Inspired by Kris I got myself a cheap juicer from Target. Oh the beauty! Oh the convenience! Do you have any idea how many dark, leafy, wonderful greens I get into my body everyday? A lot! And then there's the carrots, apples, grapes or whatever else I feel inspired to chuck in the juicer. Note to self: I do not like tomatoes or beets (however good they may be for my liver) in my juice.

I feel like I'm on the top of the world after I drink my morning veggie juice. There's energy, mental clarity and all that good stuff. Plus, I know that in juice form I can assimilate the nutrients I need right away without my liver having to put itself through the paces. And we all know how much trouble Becca has assimilating vitamins. Plus, who wants to take a vitamin when you can have all the whole food benefits of luscious kale? Or cabbage?

I've been really getting into the raw foods diet. Not totally raw, mind you, but still very raw. This morning I had my juice which included:

1 carrot
1 apple
about 8 grapes
cabbage
kale
dandelion greens
romaine lettuce
parsley
celery
cilantro

and I had a bowl of cooked oat bran with flax seed oil and fresh blueberries.

I highly encourage everyone to do a bit of research into raw foods and a mostly raw food diet. It makes so much sense and I guarantee you'll feel better. True, I'm going through a lot of medical crap but I still manage to do my yoga, spend time outside, think happy thoughts and go on the occasional outing. The time between medical crises is so much richer, fuller and healthier.

In other news, here's what I'm reading:
-Messages from Your Angels by Doreen Virtue, Ph.D
-The Raw Food Detox Diet by Natalia Rose
-You Can Heal Your Life by Louise L. Hay
-Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips by Kris Carr

All highly recommended!

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Symptom Paper

>> Thursday, July 2, 2009

If fly paper had a cousin called "Symptom Paper" I'd be it. Really. In order to make my disorganized body look more organized, I've made a list of symptoms to rattle off at my many upcoming doctor appointments and over the phone to overworked nurses.

1. Itching, particularly when lying down and on back of neck and sides. Could be the liver expanding and stretching the skin. Still have to try "liver cream" a concoction made up by the doctors at UNMC.

2. Enlarged liver and liver pain.

3. Shortness of breath even with all my breathing treatments. I saw my Pulmonologist today and we're doing a sleep apnea test, a heart ultrasound and trying a new drug.

4. Low appetite

5. Dizzy

6. Confusion

7. Sleeping a lot, though still suffering from some insomnia because of discomfort, pain and lack of breath.

8. Body temp is cold and having occasional chills.

9. Stomach cramps and nausea. Blood....

10. Increased physical anxiety and RLS probably linked to the depolupron shot I had yesterday.

11. Heart palpitations (even when I haven't had albuterol)


There's a possibility of a fluid collection near my liver so I'll get a CAT scan to see if one exists and if it needs to be drained.

Anyway, yeah, that's where things are. More tests and whatnot will give us more info. Mirarculously (I say with sarcasm) my MELD score has gone down.

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