What's Been Happening
>> Wednesday, October 20, 2010
2:00 PM
My desk
So I made it through. I’m alive and the better for it.
What a crazy last five days. Here it is in an acorn:
Friday: Potassium is down despite Herculean efforts on my and the doctors’ parts. So it’s either 12 extra pills to swallow or 1 shot of liquid potassium. I’m all for the liquid so I pour some in a little measuring cup made for cough syrup and down it like a shot. Bad idea. It tasted like dead…things. I was already a bit on the nauseous side and the potassium concoction did not help (learned today that potassium supplements can upset the stomach. Why no one told me this before I don’t know.). I yelled a bit, jumped around, drank a lot of water and then made a sacrifice to the porcelain prince (read: I threw up).
After my performance I met Aprille for lunch (don’t worry, I didn’t eat anything). This cheered me up considerably, especially as Aprille had some new anecdotes about our friends at which we laughed and flattered ourselves that we would never be as brainless as them.
Back at home I puttered around being completely useless and nauseous. Finally my Aunt Nancy and Uncle Joe arrived from Kentucky and we got down to business. The first order of the day was tea time. Later we sauntered around Sunken Garden and then had dinner at The Cup (pronounced ‘tay cup’) and were joined by my sister Ginny/Natalie and her boyfriend Doug.
Later I went to a great NA (Narcotics Anonymous) meeting and I asked my friend Lori to be my sponsor to which she said yes. I am very excited about this. Lori is awesome. She tells it like it is. Also, she wears gemstone jewelry and is Buddhist so I think we’ll get along together splendidly.
Saturday:
Shopping with my sister and Aunt Nancy=being spoiled. She insists that it is an aunts sacred duty to spoil her nieces but it was nevertheless a bit of a culture shock for my sister and I to just toss whatever we pleased onto the register. My Aunt Nancy is a very gracious woman but also a bully. Not that I’m one to talk being a hopeless bully myself. I comfort myself by saying, “Ah, it is only because I’m the oldest child” but I know it has more to do with me just wanting to be in control so I can boss my equals around.
The Huskers played a terrible game and my poor Uncle Joe, sitting somewhere on the sidelines with other alumni had to witness it up close. Still, I think he had a good time meeting old friends and acquaintances.
Sunday:
After work we all (Gramma, Mom, Ginny, Doug, Me, Aunt Nancy and Uncle Joe) met at Green Gataeu for a lovely brunch. When we were walking back to our cars afterwards I found a pigeon that had been hit and stunned in the middle of the road. Vet Tech mode took over and I brought him over to the sidewalk to assess his injuries. He was not too badly hurt but the shock eventually got to him and he died. I stayed with him while calling animal control first to get help and then to inform them of his death. He was a beautiful bird and full of innocence. I felt blessed to have shared that encounter but sad that he had to die in such a state of stress. The spiral of life was apparent to me and I thought of this time of year when things are dying. And yet, with death new seeds are sown and the circle continues. I felt the Goddess in that circle and in the symbolic meaning of this season very strongly then.
There was more shopping but I was quickly wearing down because of all the non-stop excitement of the last few days. My body was telling me that enough was enough.
Monday:
Sat around and got more and more nauseous. By evening I could stomach nothing and longed for some proper nausea med but the Specialty Clinic was closed so I tried my best with aromatherapy, ginger tea and acupressure bracelets. Nevertheless, I was up all night. I was sorely tried.
Tuesday:
In the wee hours of the morning I could throw up no more and so mom took me to the ER. My port gave the nurses a hell of a time but eventually all was settled andthe nausea med was administered. It helped but not quite enough. Still, by that point I wanted out of the noisy, bright and uncomfortable ER and was able to leave after waiting an entire hour to be discharged.
The scary part was when the nurse asked me if I needed anything for pain. I had forgotten to show the ER doctor my letter saying that they should not give me any type of pain medicine. It would have been so easy to say that yes, I should love some pain med. But what good would it have done me? I would have become even more nauseous and been all doped up with no mind of my own; and let me tell you I am so done with that. Since I wasn’t in any pain it was easy to say no. I am very afraid of narcotics now, which is a good thing, but if I am in a certain mood and in a lot of pain…well, those drugs start to look pretty good. Still, the experience of being asked so matter-of-factly if I wanted some drugs was shaking to me and later that day when I was napping the experience came back to haunt me more than a couple times.
I continued to be very sick throughout the day and in the late afternoon was taken to the hospital to have some more nausea medicine. I think it would have helped if I hadn’t had to ride in a car there and then back home. However, that night I started feeling better. I took it easy with the food just in case but, mercy of mercies, I was able to sleep through the night.
Wednesday/Today:
I woke up with a migraine but I brushed that off as I was so happy that my stomach was finally better. I went to my doctors appointment and got some things going to try and help but I’m sure the worst is over.
I celebrated by filling my new prescriptions and buying some yummy and easily digestible food at Open Harvest.
Finally I can get back to my life.
3 comments:
You have had a very busy time of it. I am proud of how well you dealt with the nausea and how well you resisting the narcs. I know how hard it can be to be in so much pain and so miserable and not head back to old crutches.
Isn't that liquid potassium the worst?! I had to take it when I had lingual tonsilitis, I was in the ER because my throat was swollen and so sore I couldn't eat or drink, and when my labs came back the ER doc was amazed I wasn't seizing with how low my potassium was. That stuff is disgusting and should be banned...Or have the flavor masked in some way.
Stay strong, dear! Healing thoughts coming your way :)
Before my heart transplant I had the worst time keeping my potassium in check, right before tx it was 1.2 when it was supposed to be between 3-5! I was having full body spasums. The K+ pills make my stomach so upset, I was taking like 18 a day-I am sooooo happy I dont have to take them anymore!
After tx I was offered all the Narcs I wanted, and anything I wanted to give me a "high". For a while it was nice, but now I am just to the point that I want to be normal, I am still in pain, but I just want to be able to live in the present and understand what is going on. It was so hard to stop taking some of that stuff, and it is hard sometimes to not go back to taking it-I totally know what you are going through.
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